by Patrick Gibbs
The lights are dimming, the popcorn is hot. It’s time for Saturday Matinee! Movies are my life. When I was 7 years old, sitting in a darkened theatre, watching Raiders of the Lost Ark for the first time, in that moment I saw the world clearly. I saw my destiny, and I knew that I wanted to be an archeologist. Then I found out they don’t really get to kill Nazis, so I decided instead to devote my life to the cinema, behind the camera, in front of it, and in the most magical of all places, the theater itself.
Movies and action figures have always gone together like Han Solo and Chewbacca in my mind. If you don’t immediately think of Star Wars when you hear the term action figure, well . . . first off, you’re not a child of the ‘70’s and ‘80s. For my generation, acquiring these figures was an obsession like no other. I’ll never forget summer of 1983, when my mother looked indulged my need for a Return of The Jedi Luke Skywalker, complete with green lightsaber and black robe. We searched all over the state, but it was worth it. I still have that figure somewhere. Probably. Or not. I was one of these kids that actually played with my action figures, and the ones that are left show the wear and tear of time. I don’t regret that I don’t have them now to sell for big bucks. The memories and magic they provided are priceless.
Now, more years later than I care to admit, I am more collector oriented in my action figure obsession, and playing with them takes more the form of presentation and display. But it’s still about the magic and the fun, and they make me feel like a kid again. Saturday Matinee is about traveling to other worlds and other times, and losing yourself in a movie, then holding a piece of that in your hand as something tangible. It’s about joy, and fun, and seasons in the sun (or the dark.).
CHRISTMAS COMES TO HOLLYWOOD
It’s the most wonderful time of the year right now, when Santa Claus prepares to bring toys to good children everywhere, and to adult collectors. Christmas is also a great time for movies; It’s A Wonderful Life!, Miracle on 34th Street, and a thousand damn versions of A Christmas Carol. But Christmas and the movies go beyond the established classics. The holiday setting can provide a delightfully ironic contrast for darker and more violent fare. And those are the movies, and figures, we’ll be looking at today.
DIE HARD (1988)
John McTiernan’s classic changed the face of the modern action movie, and turned a made for television Bill Murray type into the standard of the ‘90’s hero. John McClane was just an off duty cop attending his wife’s office Christmas party in a Century City high rise. He wasn’t Rambo, or The Terminator. He was just a guy. A guy who got hurt, and bled, and even lost his shoes. The Christmas setting plays a major role in the film, becoming a character in and of itself. If you can see the words HO-HO-HO written out without thinking “Now I Have A Machine Gun,” well . . . you’re probably the kind of snob that has a “girlfriend” or even a “wife.”
Reel Toys from NECA presents John McClane, part of the Series 3 Cult Classics Collection. John happens to be the centerpiece of my action figure collection. This 7 inch tall figure comes with a display base, made to look like a small part of the roof of the Nakatomi Plaza, where McClane fampously did battle (there are even spent shell casings at his feet.). The detail work is astonishing, from the stained wife beater to the tattoo, to my favorite part, the inner part of the upper right arm, where the names Hans and Karl are etched along with tally marks, flawlessly mimicking McClane’s hand writing as he lies atop the elevator listening to the “bad ass perpetrators” as they discover his first kill and writes all the info he can on his arm with a sharpie.
He is advertised as fully articulated, but his movement does not go beyond tilting the head, turning wrist and arms that can be repositioned point his machine gun at high, low, or medium height. Not a figure that’s made to do many poses.
Accessories: Machine gun (Ho-Ho-Ho). A cheap plastic gun with a strap that breaks easily if played with too much.
John is definitely meant for display, as should be the case for any figure that comes from an R-rated film, but the Cult Classics John McClane is a work of art. I actually use him as a Christmas Tree topper. My only minor complaint, with him is that NECA never made a Hans Gruber or Karl to go with him, but if you want to have him face off against villains, and if you’re creative, there are options.
Sadly, this figure is no longer being produced, but can be found occasionally on Amazon or ebay for around $50. If you want to check out some of the other figures in NECA’s Cult Classic Collection.
Remember to watch Die Hard this Christmas season (it’s the perfect way to spend Christmas Eve if you don’t have kids.). Michael Kamen even features actual jingling bells to eerie effect in his musical score, and the ending of the film (a wonderful homage to High Noon) features John and his wife Holly kissing in the back of a limousine as they drive away, the hero having rid the town of the outlaws, and Vaughn Monroe’s rendition of Let It Snow plays on the soundtrack. Severus Snape figure available too.
GREMLINS (1984)
If ever there was a movie that had fun with gruesome antics in a Christmas setting, it’s the Steven Spielberg produced Joe Dante ‘80’s monster flick Gremlins. “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)” plays under the opening credits, and Phoebe Cates' insanely morbid monologue about when she learned there was no Santa Claus became a pop culture legend, whether you loved or hated the story. A silly film that tries to cater to kids while featuring enough blood and gore for adults, it’s one of two films in the summer of ’84 that lead to the creation of the PG-13 rating (the other being Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom). Definitely not to be confused with great filmmaking, but it’s a thoroughly entertaining dark parody with a side dish of cute in the form of Gizmo, the furry little “Mogwaii” that the Gremlins spawn from, an addition Spielberg suggested to make the movie appeal to wider audiences.
NECA presents the Gremlins Boxed Set, which features Gizmo, our hero; Stripe, the villain, and Poker Player Gremlin, who is exactly what he sounds like. The characters are about 6 inches tall and extremely detailed. Let’s look at the three characters individually:
GIZMO
This adorable little guy is articulated with wrists and shoulders that twist, a neck ball joint, and a waist that twist and bends to approximate sitting down. Gimzo is a personal favorite '80's movie character, and the detail work is very strong, from the glint in his eye to his slight, heroic smile. My only issue with the figure is that they have given him a bit too much of a pronounced neck, presumably for articulation purpuses, but it makes him look just a but wrong. Other wise his proportions are perfect. No mobility in the legs, but frankly I don't think that would have been possible given ow short and stubby they are, but they hold his weig nicely.
Accessories: Gizmo comes with 3D glasses, and three puffballs, which fans will recognize as Gremlins in the making. This is a very clever touch, though I would liked to see his make-shift bow and arrow included as well, but that's a very minor complaint.
STRIPE
One of the best villains of the ‘80’s, Stripe was as funny as he was menacing. He was named for the white, Mohawk like stripe of white hair on his head, which sets him apart from the other gremlins. He could speak a little, and his catch phrase was "Billy Ca Ca,” his way of thumbing his nose at Billy Peltzer, the foolish teen who was given Gizmo as a pet and must take down the Gremlins he is largely responsible for creating.
Stripe’s thighs, wrists, elbows and bicep twists, and his neck and shoulders feature ball joints.
Accessories: A round saw blade to be used as a weapon, a Frisbee, or preferably both at the same time. Candy boxes from the movies (who can forget the Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs sequence?).
POKER PLAYER
This character is included to make it a set, but he’s always been a favorite of mine. He looks almost identical to Stripe apart from the lack of hair, but so were the Gremlins designed by Carlo Rambaldi in the film (in Gremlins 2: The New Batch, Rick Baker took over and made each individual gremlin more distinctive, but a good deal more cartoonish as well).
There is a small hole behind his left ear to fit a playing card which has a peg so he can wear the fifth card, which he uses to cheat (which gets him shot dead in the movie.).
Accessories: Playing cards, poker chips, popcorn and Oreos (the last items are connected and just sit at his feet.) He also has a green visor that fits nicely on the top of his head.
As Raoul sings in The Phantom of The Opera, “ a collector’s piece indeed.” This set does the movie proud, and is the perfect showcase for NECA’s signature quality.
Out of circulation, and not available through necaonline.com.
You can find it here through Amazon, but it’s going to cost you $189 bucks! So you’d better be a serious fan. Or you can peruse here for several Gremlins goodies.
BATMAN RETURNS (1992)
Tim Burton’s follow up to the 1989 box office bonanza begins in during the Christmas season, as a baby is born to Tucker and Esther Cobblepot. Unfortunately, the child is born hideously deformed, and they keep it in a small cage. After the baby kills the family cat (which, of course, could easily happen), the Cobblepots do what any rational parents would do. They go for a walk to dump the stroller off of a small bridge. 33 years later, it’s Christmas time in Gotham once again, and the city is plagued by rumored sightings of a mysterious “Penguin Man” in the sewers. This turns out to be the child, Oswald Cobblepot (played by Danny DeVito), who comes up out of the sewer to team with a wealthy industrialist, find out who his parents are, run for Mayor and wage war on Gotham (December is a busy month for all of us, but Oswald takes it a bit far.). Oswald is, of course, thwarted by Batman, who is definitely more interested in the film’s super villainess, Catwoman (played by Michelle Pfeifer.). In the film’s closing scene, Bruce Wayne thinks he sees the supposedly dead Selena Kyle going down a dark alley. But when he jumps out the car to follow, all he finds is her black cat, Miss Kitty. Bruce takes the cat with him, and as he gets back in the car, he wishes Alfred a Merry Christmas.
Selective memory lets fans forget that before Joel Schumacher killed the Batman franchise with Batman & Robin, he actually came in to save it (successfully) with Batman Forever after Burton’s Christmas caper left audiences and critics polarized. A triumph of style but, at best, a muddled piece of storytelling, Batman Returns is too dark and violent for kids and too utterly silly for adults (example: “The Penguins are moving above ground.”)
This retro figure was released along with other old Warner Bros. DC characters, including Superman and General Zod from Superman II, as well as two versions of Michael Keaton’s Batman and a Catwoman figure.
Standing 4 inches tall, The Penguin is probably the best of the lot, although the face on the Christopher Reeve Superman is terrific. Oddly, Penguin is the only Batman figure to get the physical proportions right, perhaps to make up for the raw deal he got in life. The detail work is strong for a 4 inch figure, and he easily stays standing under his own weight. He's here.
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