I’m willing to put my life on the line for a great deal on a figure. Just today, I met a strange guy in a Jack in the Box parking lot. I texted him after meeting via email on Craigslist only two hours earlier. Was I reluctant? Yes. Was I cautious? Yes. Did I approach his car slowly? Yes. Was it a sketchy neighborhood? Yes. Would I tell anyone else to do the same? No.
Every now and then someone will ask me about Craigslist, “You ever bought or sold anything on there?” Yeah. I’ve bought and sold lots of stuff – cars, bikes, fitness equipment, tickets, furniture, and of course, figures. And I’ve gone to places that I would never advise anyone to go, at times that are downright sinister! Tonight, I went to a parking lot to meet some guy. He advertised action figures on Craigslist. How bad can he be?! Some of you might have heard of the recent story about the pregnant woman who was assaulted after responding to a Craigslist ad. I’ll spare you the details. But action figures? They’re safe, right?
I rationalize that because I’m an able-bodied man I presumably have a fighting chance. And besides, what could go wrong in a fast food parking lot? There are witnesses around! In fact, he was as scared of me as I was of him. I approached his car slowly. He exited his car slowly. He didn’t remove the figures from his passenger seat right away. He got out of his car, eyeballing me like I was eyeballing him. Maybe I was a killer! Maybe I was about to jack him for all his figures?! He started with the 3 ¾” Star Wars figures. He kept a poker face. But I wanted McFarlane’s 12” Halo Master Chief (Mint In Package)! I didn’t drive on two freeways for 3 ¾” Star Wars figures!
$40? Okay $40. Pretty reasonable. It’s in great shape. Really, I didn’t even know if I wanted the figure when I headed there. I told him before I left that I just wanted to see it, and if I liked it I’ll buy it. He offered me the “Don’t waste my time” thing. I told him I had to see it in person. Not that complicated. After all, I was willing to risk my life for it. So obviously I was interested. There were times I had my girlfriend drop me off telling her that if I wasn’t back in ten minutes to call the police.
There’s just something about getting a nice figure at a nice price that makes me willing to put my life on the line. I once went to a guy’s apartment at night to get a great figure for $20 less than eBay price. It was such a great deal that I bought two - one for me and one as a gift. After all, he had a whole case! After ten minutes of standing next to his bed I politely excused myself, mid-sentence. He appeared annoyed. But I wanted to GTFO of there! And I had to park two blocks away because parking on his street sucked! But man this figure was awesome. I’d never even seen it before.
eBay is so much safer. (I suppose. I mean some stranger has your address.) But where’s the thrill? The looking over your shoulder. That feeling that you’re doing something illegal even though you’re not! Craigslist is just so much seedier! I have a 100% feedback rating on eBay, based on nearly 600 transactions, but I keep going back to Craigslist. It’s like eBay is my reliable wife but Craigslist is my hot mistress. And I’m willing to risk it all for her. The payoff is worth the risk. I got a $75 figure for $40 damn it!
I’m willing to die to save $30 on Craigslist. (Which would only be $25.83 after eBay and PayPal fees.)
Sal Rodriguez pounds the pavement in Los Angeles as an actor, comedian, and writer. He began collecting figures upon discovering UFC and WWE figures by Jakks Pacific. He lives with his two cats - Fluff Daddy and Little Mister, and over 2,000 action figures. Subscribe to his YouTube channel. Look for him in the recent commercial for AutoZone as Bernie the wrestler.