You’ll never hear me say I have too many figures; I’ll tell you I don’t have enough room. There’s a difference. One implies too much of something, the other implies not enough room for something. My apartment is just too small, but I don’t have too many figures. And, in truth, I actually do have enough space, especially once I move some stuff around. I have room for at least two more display cases. I even have room in one of my existing cases whenever I move those books out of the way. I mean, if they’re in the back of a display case I’ll never read them. So I need to get them out of there.
My cats haven’t used their cat tree in almost a year. It’s a nice one too, one-of-a-kind. It looks an actual tree with branches. In the past, my cats used it every day but they couldn’t give a shit about it now. I need to move it. Problem is, I’ll need to move a display case full of figures in order to clear a space near the doorway to move out the cat tree. Before that, I’ll need to move stacks of figures that sit in front of the display case. I’ll need to move dozens of figures in packages to move an entire display case of a couple hundred figures to move the cat tree out of the room to fit another display case into its place!
So much work. And my schedule is limited. I mean, I’m a full-time worker now. When is this supposed to happen? When is my collection supposed to be organized? Maybe I do have too many figures. Maybe I’m just fooling myself. It’s a joke I play on my own mind – convincing myself that I don’t have too many figures but just not enough room. Who am I kidding? Me! That’s who I’m kidding. There’s figures everywhere. That wasn’t my intention, to have figures all over the place. I’m no hoarder. Or am I? Maybe I’m crazy. Crazy people don’t think they’re crazy, right? Maybe I have a serious problem. I’m probably in denial.
Thank god for my friend’s storage. He moved back home to Connecticut about five years ago and left behind his storage unit, granting me carte blanche access. I go there about once per week. All my Jakks Pacific UFC figures are there as well as most of my Jakks and Mattel WWE figures. All my nice base display stands and dioramas are there too. There’s no way I’d be able to display even ¼ of my figures if they were on their display stands. But I’m not just going to throw them away. What a waste that would be!
Since I’m sharing, something even my figure collector friends don’t know – I also collect diecast cars. It started as a consolation prize. I’d go out hunting for figures, and if I didn’t find anything I’d head over to the car aisles. I’ve got hundreds of cars, all scales, from 1/64 to 1/18. I consider it my sub-collection, sort of a B squad. My favorites are the pedal cars. Damn I love those little things - little toy replicas of childrens’ pedal cars. I just don’t have enough room to display them all. I need a bigger place. I really do.
Sal Rodriguez pounds the pavement in Los Angeles as an actor, comedian, and writer. He began collecting figures upon discovering UFC and WWE figures by Jakks Pacific. He lives with his two cats, Fluff Daddy and Little Mister, and over 2,000 action figures. Subscribe to his YouTube channel.